Sunday, April 06, 2008

I Don't Remember My Mother's Voice


My mother has only been gone since Fall of 2007; yet I can't remember what her voice sounded like. I can't remember anything specific.

Mother's Day is getting closer and I am devastated that for the first time, ever...I will not have a mother to celebrate it with
.

Besides that-my father in law's girlfriend, my friend -Bert passed away today. She went into the hospital almost a month ago due to complications from a twisted intenstine. Due to infection from surgery & hospital care, she deteriorated - the doctor released her to a care home, but she was re-admitted to the hospital again this week as she worsened from lack of proper care.

Marvin called us today to let us know that Bert lost brain activity during the night and they turned off life support today.

Of the two of them, they looked out for each other in Arizona. Both of them had separate homes, but would get together for dates, companionship, and nookie. It wasn't a big love affair, but it was the best they could do at this point in their lives. But I never imagined that Bert would be the
first to go - she was in better health than Marv; had unlimited energy; just a little ball of activity. She was the one that ran around with Greg and myself when we visited Oct 2007 in Arizona. We had lots of fun at the Arizona Desert Museum. Bert ran us off our feet- She also cooked dinner at her home one night while we were there. This is a photo of Greg & Bert in front of her home. Marv's home is like a showcase home from Modern Living; Bert had a wonderful, homey, warm & comfortable home.

We were planning to visit Marv when he went to Missouri in the spring and I was looking forward to seeing Bert again.


Greg and I thought about going to see them right after we returned from Iowa; but we didn't know she would worsen, or if she even wanted us to visit at all. Some people don't like others around when it gets that bad. We weren't relatives. And I was forced to wait around for a loved one to die when I was younger. It was AWFUL. I think that has influenced my attitude towards haunting the hospital when people are dying. But now, I wish we had gone down. But I honestly thought that Bert would recover. I never once thought it would come to this.

I had lots in common with Bert. She was a dear, dear woman. I sincerely wish that SHE had been my mother-in-law. She was sweet. Loving. Caring.

There are no words to say how much I will miss her.

I love you Bert. I miss you already.

But I know that as with my mother, I will forget the sound of your voice, too.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

oh bob! i'm so sorry for your loss! big hugs to you!